Saturday, February 06, 2010

Relationships...The Smart Way..!!

Trust me, over the past few years I’ve learned more about the value of relationships than I could possibly ever imagine. Thank you all to those who encouraged, uplifted, and most importantly listened…truly listened to whatever I uttered.

Conversely, thank you all too those who did the exact opposite of the above. Without you…I would not had been the person I am today.
The idea of rebound relationships is so ingrained into the way we think about dating that it just seems natural to look for one after a breakup. There's something to be said for getting back in the saddle, choosing a partner when your judgment is clouded usually does more harm than good overall. If you want to get over your ex fast, there are better ways to do it.

The first step to keeping yourself from doing something you'll regret is to take an honest look at what you're feeling and understand how those feelings can lead you places you'd rather not go. A lot of times we just miss the companionship and look for someone to fill the gap in our schedule and distract us from the fact that our heart's just been broken. In that case, make a point of finding a social time-filler that doesn't involve romance.

The best thing you can do to avoid getting involved with someone who's all wrong for you is stick to your standards. In fact, go ahead and raise them a little just to add a safety buffer. If the person you're thinking about dating is less kind, less intelligent, less anything that you'd normally want, stay away.

When we look for someone to rebound with, we need someone fast. Normally We don't have time to waste looking for someone we really click with, so we tend to latch on to someone we already know and have at least some rapport with. It might be a close friend, a co-worker, even someone who works at the grocery store down the street. If you find yourself falling for someone you've never been the least bit attracted to before, stop and think about what's really going on here.

Instead of filling your time with go-nowhere dates, get out and make some new friends (that's friends,not lovers.There's a difference.) Get involved in something you've always wanted to do but never had time for. Whatever you do, don't sit around pining for your ex or scouring the bookstore shelves for self help books.

Even if your not sobbing into your pillow every night, the end of a relationship will naturally make you feel a little bummed out and low on energy. Take that into account and try not to start any major projects for a few weeks. Instead, treat yourself to some time out to do something you enjoy.

Of course, not every rebound relationship ends up a disaster. If you're lucky, you'll have a fun fling. If you do decide to get involved with someone after a breakup, though, make sure you've taken a little off by yourself and you're not lowering your standards.

Bottom line : While we should try hard prevent broken relationships, rebound dates gone wrong are much easy to avoid


Edward said...
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Edward said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
AD said...

:) quite true .. well, it was a good reminder! thanks. guess i bumped into the right blog, right post at right time.